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Disclaimer: Episode 20 uploaded in mysoju.com is not our project

Episode 20: all parts are out now.

Our apologies for not being able to finish this episode sooner. We've been busy the past week that working on this episode has been delayed.

Chapter 7 - A New Beginning

[Translated by Blur sotong]
[Edited by Beauty_Karova]

"It was Dylan's intention to help Xin Yi, by bringing her to Shanghai to give her a fresh start. She, on the other hand, did not let him down and became the disciple of a renounced artistic potter, Zhong Shan Long. In the beginning, by offering her encouragements and companionship he intended a simple and innocent friendship. However, as time went by, he discovered that he wanted something more than just friendship, he wanted to use his whole life to protect her."

Teacher, please, do not call me.

A companion to share the class duty workload with me.

Someone to remember my birthday.

During hide and seek, please remember to locate me before heading home, do not forget about me…

It's raining.

Xin Yi lifts her head and looks at the strings and strings of falling rain; she is lost in her thought and her feeling of helplessness.

It's raining, it's a bit cold, how nice it would be to be inside a house, drinking a cup of hot tea, eating the not-so-delicious sandwiches prepared by a certain someone, it would also be as a blessing!

However, she is alone walking on a quiet alley, everything is completely bleared, and even her own future and life is unknown to her.

Happiness is beyond her grasp, falling in love is just a dream for her .

To meet someone who loves me and to love him back.

When would such a wish be fulfilled? Or, maybe she can only be chasing after her prince charming in her dreams, a prince charming that would never stop for her or take a liking of her.

I have chosen Anna, she is my one and only true love.

It would always be Anna, is there anything to be surprised of? She should have known it in the beginning, shouldn't she? Anna is his princess, and to him, Xin Yi is only trouble that he does not have the choice but to accept and bear full responsibility.

She should be grateful that he does not hate and she should not ask too much from him.

However, she only wishes that the life she had with him would last a little longer, just for few months since she is carrying his child. Wouldn't it be possible?

Does it mean that I'm not worthy to be loved? She is asking herself, God, the rain and even the approaching cold and lonely night.

Is it really impossible? All she wishes is for someone to care about her, to love her, to find her and not to abandon her. Her only wish is that when she has given out her whole heart to the person, in return, she would also be loved.

Is this wish too demanding?

She uses her arms to wrap around her lower limbs and sits at the corridor. The night gets deeper and colder but nothing can compare to her feeling of being abandoned, helpless and hopeless.

"Cun Xi, what are you doing now? Are you dancing happily with Anna now…


He is searching and looking for her.

After sending Anna home, Cun Xi drives the car through main roads and small alleys and as the night gets deeper, his search gets more intense.

"Silly Xin Yi, where are you hiding?" He mumbles to himself. He is is worried and angry that she has left without a word; her hand-phone is not switched-on and she hasn't contacted him. "Don't you know that granny is very worried?"

In fact, he is also very worried; he simply refuses to admit it. He keeps telling himself that he is searching for her intensively because he does not want his granny to be worried.

He is not one of those caring guys that she has mentioned, and to someone who is unrelated to him, he can be very cold and cruel to. He is scarcely nice to her and she is so grateful to him, treating him like a philanthropist, isn't it funny!

How could Jiang Mu Island produce a whole lot of innocent idiots? He mumbles to himself, and then focuses his thought on himself driving his car aimlessly; searching for her is also very stupid and silly.

"Damn!" He exclaims, crunches his fist then hits the handle to change direction forcefully, releasing all his frustration.

Unexpectedly, another car comes gushing in the opposite direction out from nowhere. Trepidation is flooding over him, it is a close shave, and he almost could not brake in time.

The other driver stops his car, gets down and gives him a dressing-down. He impatiently twitches his brows and fails to notice that Xin Yi has passed by him silently.

He conveniently throws his name card to the party. "If there is anything wrong with your car, give me a call!" After giving some instruction, he drives off.

Tonight, both Xin Yi and he have missed each other at a couple of occasions but neither knows about it. It is almost dawn and the rain has stopped before he spots her at a garden near their estate.

She is squatting down beside the patch of sand near a puddle of wet mud, digging up the wet mud, making mud dolls - a male and a female, a pair of loving husband and wife.

She still requires an adorable baby. She thinks and digs more wet mud. Without the baby, they would never have become husband and wife…

"I have finally found you." Cun Xi's voice is ringing behind her.

She turns around and is completely taken by surprise; she can't believe her eyes.

He has found her! She thinks that nobody would have bothered to look for her…

He drags her up and rebukes her. "What do you thinking you are doing? How could you leave without a word and turn off your hand-phone? Don't you know that I… granny would be worried about you?"

Is it him? Is it really him? He has really come to look for her?

"Cun Xi." She mumbles. Then, raising her trembling hands she touches his shoulder, making sure he is not an illusion.

"You are so cold! You got drenched in the rain?" Cun Xi is clutching her freezing hands tightly. "How could you be so careless with your health? Have you forgotten that you are pregnant?"

She is still dazzled and offers a docile and gentle apology. "Sorry." She should have taken good care of herself since she is pregnant.

"Don't apologize to me!" He reprimands her, but as he's about to scold her further, he sees her teary eyes and he can not bring himself to do so. Instead, he takes in a deep breath. "You should wait for me here; I will go over to the mini-mart across to get you some hot drink."

"Okay." She nods her head obediently, followed him to the garden entrance and waiting for him by the roadside.

He should not have let go of her hand and left her alone waiting by the roadside. The tragedy could have been avoided.

But he does not expect it to happen, so he lets go of her hand and leaves her there alone, and when he comes out of the mini-mart, he is dumbfounded and helpless as he watches a car speed by and accidentally knock the emotionally disturbed Xin Yi down.

"Xin Yi," he shouts for her madly, witnesses her body flow into the air and land on the ground and fresh blood gushing out from her profusely.


The aftermath is like a dream.

The ambulance takes Xin Yi to the hospital and Cun Xi is pacing outside the operation theatre. The surgeon has informed him that Xin Yi had a miscarriage and that she is in a very critical and serious condition. He could not save their baby, but he sincerely hopes that Xin Yi will survive the ordeal. Couple of hours pass by, the operation ends and Xin Yi is wheeled into ICU for observation.

He keeps watching over Xin Yi for a day and a night and finally she regains her consciousness. She is emotionless when she discovers that she has a miscarriage and does not speak a word.

He sees her being dumbfounded, and comprehending that she must be very upset with her loss he tries to console her. "Don't be sad, the baby is gone but it is okay. Only you are…"

"What do you mean? Losing the baby is okay?" She cuts him off and glares at him with pain.

He pauses. "What I meant…"

"What you mean is that the baby was so troublesome. If not for the baby, you would not have been forced to marry me and I would have no reason to keep pestering you. Am I right?"

"Xin Yi, it is not like …"

"Don't say any more." She shuts him up, refusing him a chance to clarify himself. She has a heartache, it is so painful, as if a part of her is being amputated and blood comes gushing out profusely. She has lost their baby and he has told her that it is alright. He does not care about the baby at all and all along it was only her that was concerned about their baby. "Don't say anything, get out, get out of the room!"

"Xin Yi…"

"I beg you, leave. Don't bother me, leave me alone!" Tears are rolling down her cheeks.

He looks at her, lost as to what he should do and reluctantly leaves the ward. He dares not leave the hospital and keeps watch outside her ward, worrying that something bad might happen to her.

Anna, who hears that Cun Xi does not go into the office to work or home to rest and keeps watching over Xin Yi at the hospital, rushes to look for him there. She sees his remorseful look and it makes her heart ache.

She persuades him to go home and takes a rest but he refuses and insists that he will stay at the hospital to watch over Xin Yi.

He has changed! The present him no longer sets her in the first place. In his heart, there is another woman.

Anna is worried and angry. "How can you just think about her? Have you ever thought about me? Do you know how painful it is to see you in this state? In the past, you never let me worry about you. Tell me truthfully, have you fallen for Xin Yi?"

Cun Xin is caught by surprise. "I have not." He denies straight away.

"Tell me then, what is she to you?"

"She…" Cun Xi pauses for a long time before answering. "She is like a post-it."

"Post-it?" Anna can not comprehend.

When you need it, she is always around, you are not aware of her presence. However, when you loose her one day, you begin to understand her importance, you begin to value her…"

Cun Xi sighs and is about to explain when Anna catch sight of the ajar ward-door and takes the opportunity. She cuts Cun Xi off and, smiling sweetly at him she places her hands on his shoulder. "I understand what you mean; Chen Xin Yi is like the Post-it kit, nothing important, right? Hmmm…you should have told me earlier, and I could not have misunderstood you. Then, you must be very hungry? At least, accompany me for a dinner? Ok?"

He can not refuse her and allows her to pull him towards the elevator. It has escaped his notice that Xin Yi is hiding silently behind the door. She has witnessed the whole event and tears are rolling down her cheeks.

The next day, after Cun Xin rushes to all his meeting and official documents in the office, he makes his way to the hospital. But Xin Yi has disappeared without a trace, leaving behind the divorce paper and the wedding band.

Cun Xi picks up the wedding band. He is stunned and for a moment he can almost hear Xin Yi whispering softly in his ear –

"I give you my blessing!"


Not wanting to worry her parents, Xin Yi decides not to make her way back to Jiang Mu Island. At the moment she can not make up her mind where she should be heading and towing her luggage, she makes her way to Pope Saint John’s Church.

She is standing at the entrance cracking her head to think of a way to convince the priest to allow her to sleep in the church for a short period of time in order to sort out her life and her future.

"Xin Yi, what are you doing here?" Dylan asks her. "You came to visit the children? Or…" He stops after seeing her luggage, raising his eyebrows. "What happened?"

She replies sadly, "I left the Ji household."

"Why did you leave?"

"There is no more valid reason for me to stay at Ji household any longer." Xin Yi explains and mentions simply about Anna's return and her miscarriage from the beginning till the end to Dylan.

He is startled. "I never knew that there was an Anna."

"She was always there." Xin Yin answers painfully. "Cun Xin and I had an agreement from the beginning, stating that once the baby is delivered, we would divorce each other."

Dylan is stunned, and it takes him awhile to ask. "What's up now? What are your plans?"

"I do not know yet." She shakes her head. "Maybe I will head down south and find a job there…"

"Do you want to go to Shanghai?" He cuts her off suddenly.

She is dumbfounded.

"I am planning to setup an art gallery in Shanghai, in another couple of days; I will be making a trip over there. Are you interested to come along with me?"

"I? Go with you to Shanghai?" She is astonished. Shanghai sounds like another city far away.

"Famous Pottery Artist Zhong Shan is also there, I sent to him a photograph of your pottery work the last time and he appreciates your work. Maybe you could become his pottery apprentice."

She? Become Pottery Artist Zhong Shan's apprentice? "How could it be?"

"Why not? You have not even tried, how can you be sure that he will not accept you as his apprentice?"

"But…" She is still unsure.

"This is a good opportunity for you to start a new life. Don't you want a transformation?" Dylan persuades her convincingly. "Xin Yi, don't you want to give yourself another opportunity to see what you can achieve?"

Does she have a chance? She is shaken. The ordinary her, will there be an opportunity for transformation?


"Cun Xi!"

A voice is calling him from the other pole of the globe but Cun Xi hardly moves at all, he is in deep thought.

"Cun Xi!" The person calls him again.

He finally regains his composure, shuts down his hand-phone and slowly turns around.

"Anna, you are here."

Anna raises her brows and walks towards him to face him. Seeing his hand grasp his hand-phone tightly, she narrows her eyes. "You are so inattentive, what's wrong with you lately?" She asks gently. "Does Chen Xin Yi's departure have such a great impact on you?"

Cun Xi is startled. With great difficulty he tries to regain his emotionless composure. "I am alright, Anna, you don't have to worry."

Anna does not believe him but she is smart enough not to pursue further. Instead, she turns her attention to a scarf lying on the top of a coffee table in a corner.

"What is this?" She asks as she picks up the scarf and examines it; the workmanship is not skilful. She shakes her head. "Cun Xi, did you buy this?"

"Don't you recognize this scarf?" He is flabbergasted.

"I don't." She is speechless.

Cun Xi snatches the scarf from her and stares at her in bewilderment. "Didn't you give it to me as a gift?"

"A gift from me?" She is mystified. "I did not."

Cun Xi raises his brows. He is puzzled, if the scarf is not from Anna, why does the maid has told him that the scarf is from her and it was delivered by Federal Express? Needless to say…he is stunned for a moment, he quickly opens his drawer and takes out the little birthday card and the writing traces are exactly the same as the traces on the divorce agreement, it is from the same person.

Why did Xin Yi send the gift on behalf of Anna? Was she worried that Anna forgetting his birthday would make him upset? In order to console him, she has forgone her own intention.

She is silly! How can such a stupid person exist? He is shocked; he catches a condition on the divorce agreement at the brink of his eyes. He takes a closer look and discovers that she has removed the alimony part from the agreement.

This is the agreement that he has insisted that she signs it on their wedding day, agreeing that they would part harmoniously once the baby is born, that he would give her a sum of money and provide her a monthly alimony, but she does not want anything from him.

She does not want his money, she does not request for his love, how could she…how could she be so stupid?

"I have been too busy lately, and kept forgetting about your birthday present." Anna touches his shoulder gently and asks sweetly. "Darling, what do you desire?"

While he is looking at Anna's lovely smile, his mind is reflecting the painful expression on Xin Yi's face when she has found out that she had a miscarriage – "I do not want anything." He longs for Xin Yi, he longs to find her…

Looking at his facial expression, Anna is disturbed, she questions him. "Cun Xi, you are regretting, right?"

He is stunned. "What are you talking about?"

"You are regretting choosing me that day, and not her?"

"I…" Cun Xi is dumbfounded; he should deny it, shouldn't he? But he is speechless.

His silence is causing more pain to Anna. "Couldn't our many years relationship withhold the entire crisis? Compare to the couple of months you have spent with her? You said that you would marry me, didn't you?"

Cun Xi's chest tightens. "I did not forget."

"Then don't think about her, okay?" She is holding his chin, a sweet expression on her face and adds with a sense of mischief. "From today onwards, you can only think of me, I am the woman you truly love."

She is actually the woman he truly loves, isn't it…

As Cun Xi glances at Anna helplessly, with a brink of an eyelid, she snatches his hand-phone away and starts keying a couple of buttons swiftly.

"What are you doing?" He snatches back his hand-phone, takes a look and his expression changes. "You have deleted the photographs?"

"Don't be angry!" She shakes his shoulders gently and acts coquettishly. "Since you have already decided that you wanted to be with me, you should just forget about Chen Xin Yi, right? You do not need to keep any of her photographs."

Cun Xi is silenced, an infuriated look on his face.

Anna knows that he is enraged and annoyed. She takes a deep breath. "Cun Xi, I love you, I cannot live without you." She gazes at him pathetically. "Don't leave me, I have nothing except you."

"What do you mean?" His expression is full of heaviness. "Aren't you going back to New York to continue dancing?"

"I cannot go back anymore." She whispers voicelessly. "I cannot dance anymore, I have injured my feet. Actually I came back for physiotherapy, and I am not even sure whether I will fully recover…"

"You should have told me earlier!" He panics. "Why wait till now to inform me?"

"Because of my pride!" She bellows and her eyes tears. "Cun Xi, I don't want you to think that I am asking for your sympathy and empathy, I only ask that…"

"I understand, you do not need to explain anymore." How could he not empathize with her? Not being able to perform on stage...Anna must be so lost. He glances at her gently. "Don't worry, I am sure you will be able to dance again. I will be there for you."

"Cun Xi" Anna is so touched that she rushes into his embrace.

He hugs her, gently pats her back but he is emotionless and expressionless.

He can not forsake Anna now, so he an only forgo Xin Yi, since he has already made his choice on his birthday. He can not regret it now.


No anymore–

With Dylan's help, Xin Yi manages to rent a small apartment in Shanghai, and starts her life there. In the beginning, she is still grieving her loss, and suffers in pain. Dylan does not force her but makes an effort to visit her during his free time, accompanying her and bringing her around Shanghai.

After a period of time, Xin Yi begins to move away from her pain and suffering and starts to stand on her two feet again. Feeling embarrassed, she requests to help out at Dylan's art gallery on her free will. Dylan, besides allocating her some administrative jobs, also takes the opportunity to introduce her to the famous Pottery Artist Zhong Shan Long.

Zhong Shan Long intentionally and deliberately tests her. "When you look at this piece of artwork, what do you see?"

"I don't have any impression, it is not my work, if you teach me, I would be able to illustrate it to you." Xin Yi's unpretentious and unintentional answer surprises him. This, combined with Dylan's highly recommendation, convinces him to train her as his apprentice and disciple.

Xin Yi can not believe that she has the chance to learn under such a renowned artist, thus she takes her lessons seriously.

However, the artist has a very strict demand and after a couple of failures, Xin Yi is at the verge of running away.

She packs her luggage and secretly plans on returning back to Taiwan but Dylan comes just in time to stop her.

"Where are you heading?" He queries peremptorily.

Xin Yi, ashamed and embarrassed looks down and refuses to answer.

"Are you planning to run back to Taiwan? Didn't you mention that becoming a pottery artist was your ambition and inspiration? After a couple of failures, you are going to give up so easily?"

"I don't think I can make it." She whispers. She has never succeeded in doing anything correctly from young till now; she is always the cause of disappointment to all around her.

"You have not really put in effort to try, how could you say that you can never make it?" Dylan reprimands her severely. "You are right, at present moment, you are nothing, just like this mass of clay. However, through the skilful hands of the potter, it can become a valuable and precious piece of pottery. Needless to say, the process is going to be bitter and painful, just like making a pottery. Every piece of valuable pottery, every successful person also went through this painful process of training – What do you think makes Anna a successful ballerina?

Anna! The mention of this name, the woman that Cun Xi truly loves, causes Xin Yi to overcome her doubts.

"She is able to dance gracefully on stage, all due to the amount of hard work she had put in, she also went through a lot of suffering in order to achieve the standard on stage. Do you think that without the suffering and painful process, you could transform from a caterpillar into a graceful butterfly?"


"Are you going to lose to her? Beside losing your love to her, are you also going to prove that she is much better than you in term of character, determination?"

Xin Yi is dumb-stricken, she suddenly recalls what Cun Xi has mentioned to her before – Our life is a gamble, we will not win every game, however, if we still have the fund, there's always hope.

He mentioned that her future is in her hand, and she should not look down on herself anymore…

"I will not lose!" Xin Yi exclaims loudly, staring into Dylan's eyes, speaking with great determination. "I will give it a try, I will persevere, I want to prove that I am capable of doing it…it is not only like this."

She does not want to lose to the woman Cun Xi loves, she also wants to show him that she is not just a post-it girl, she can also be successful, and she is capable of craving out a successful path for herself.

After making her decision, Xin Yi goes straight into the studio and begins to work on the clay, skipping a good night of sleep. She finally succeeds in creating her own piece of pottery.

However, she knows that she has only succeeded in overcoming her first obstacle. In the long run, there would be a lot of them along the way. She would need to have the strength and the perseverance to press on and overcome each obstacle.

One day, while she is at home concentrating on drawing out the sketches for her new pieces of pottery, Dylan comes to visit her with a box of pizza.

"Don't tell me you have not taken your meal yet?" He asks jokingly. "I bought a pizza, have a bit with me!"

"Thank you." Xin Yi takes a break, and makes a pot of coffee for her guest and herself. They spend the time eating and chit-chatting with each other.

Dylan tells her that he has decided to focus his career in Shanghai in future and stop being a global-trotter.

"You are going to settle down?" Xin Yin is surprised. "I remember you told me that you enjoy travelling around and did not like to stay in one place for a prolonged period."

Dylan has lost his parents when he was young and grown up in an orphanage. By mere determination and perseverance he has succeeded in life, became a well-known art gallery owner, helped international art collector source for items and examined collections authenticities. Beside these, he also travelled to Amazon Forest for expedition. He's a man who lives his life to the fullest.

Who could have thought that such a man can decide to settle down in Shanghai?

"Actually come to think of it, it is not a bad idea to settle." Dylan takes a meaningful glance at Xin Yi. "And I have discovered that there are many interesting things in Shanghai."

"Is it?" Xin Yi fails to catch the hint, and asks. "Don't tell me, you have decided to settle down?"

"Why not? If there is someone who is willing to marry me!"

"If you propose, any woman would gladly accept it."

"Are you willing?"

"Me?" Xin Yi is dumbfounded. "You must be joking!"

"What if I am serious?" Dylan asks randomly.

Xin Yi shakes her head. "You must be kidding me." She concludes. "Anyway, I am not suitable for you, I have never thought about getting married."

"Are you afraid?" Dylan asks wittingly.

Xin Yi is distracted and quiet.

Dylan observes her closely. "I heard that Anna has opened a dancing studio in Taiwan during my last trip back there."

"Really? Anna is in Taiwan." She is silent and gives a weak smile. "Then, they are getting married soon, that's nice, Cun Xi must be very happy."

Dylan raises his eyebrow. "Xin Yi…"

"Don't worry." Xin Yi knows that Dylan is worried about her. She makes a gesture to tell him to stop worrying about her.

"I am fine; I want to give him my blessing too. He has found his own happiness; I would also search for mine."

"That's right!" Dylan is glad that she can think this way. "Your happiness is in your own hands; don't expect anyone to give it to you freely."

In the past, she was too naïve to think that her prince charming could appear, she was been misled by those men and made a fool of herself. Xin Yi smiles bitterly and agrees, she is not going to be as silly as before. From this day onward, Xin Yi is no longer the unrespected "Post-it" girl.

"Dylan, I have just created a new design, would you provide me with some comments?"

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